The Way of The Cateye

(She Bought The Building Edition)

Order off the menu – that’s why we have one.
Keep your fork.
We will gladly substitute nothing for anything, or we might substitute something for something, but we will never substitute something for nothing (no guarantees, ever).
Ask for water if you want it.
Being annoying is prohibited (open to our interpretation, staff excluded).
No gum sticking … anywhere. Expect inspections.
We don’t and won’t poach your eggs.
If you have a fork then you don’t need a spoon to stir your coffee.
Order all your condiments: salsa, cream, honey, ketchup, etc. when you order the rest of your stuff. All at once, that’s the idea.
Put your money on the table edge when you are ready to bolt.
Clean your plate – expect chastisement if you don’t.
Save room for dessert with ice cream, naturally.
Expect a smart remark when you ask, “What’s good?”
Finish your coffee.
No asking for more coffee just because you yacked too long while it got cold.
Please don’t say, “We’re ready to order now” (unless the service is really bad – in which case tell Bean first thing!)
We love kids, help us keep it that way.
If you’re smoking in here you’d better be on fire. Expect extinguishing.
Don’t even think about drinking and driving or you’re in big trouble with Bean and her spatula.
50 cents off to anyone who wears their own Cateye glasses throughout their entire meal. No lenses required. Add a cowboy hat for 50 more cents.

More fun. More food. Less fuss. Eat, live and think large. Dare to be free. Live like an oak tree with a mosquito’s life span, dance around lots and remember chickens are quite some birds.

The small print: We reserve the right to constantly change the rules and enforce unwritten ones.
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This page was last updated on: 11/01/2002